It's a new year, and a new you -- and man, we really hope that the new you likes goofs about wieners, because we have them in spades. We've also got a little bit of warm encouragement to help you complete your resolutions, couched comfortably within even more genital humor.

Suggested talking points: Twenty-Dozen, Hairstyle Secrets, Taco Coordinator, Hipster Walrus, Along Came Polly Museum, Dickbats, Bathroom Brother, Feety Pajamas, Loveboss

It's our second annual Candlenights special, and you know that means! Actually, you might not, since it's only the second time we've done it. Oh, well, it means that we go the whole episode without dropping any profane language, so you can share it with the innocent, nubile ears of your family. Also, you shouldn't say "nubile ears" in front of them, because that's kind of profane.

Suggested talking points: Raspberry Pillow, The Long Con, Santa Baby, Trampires, 1 P.E., Christmas Conspiracy, Forever Lazy, Mistlesmooch, Measure Your Year in Gifts, The Briefness, Unwanted Twilight, Cat Buglary

It's the second part of our recent live show double header in Austin, Texas. Don't feel compelled to skip it if you already listened to the last one! It's got entirely different questions, and also, we get significantly more tore-up on three-dollar Walgreens booze.

We're live in Austin for the first part of our two-show comedy extravaganza. As it turns out, everything is bigger in Texas, and boy, does that include shame. Come, listen to our ill-conceived goofs and monkeyshines.

We're trying awfully hard to hitch our caboose of comedy to the engine of holiday cheer, but it's pretty difficult to do so when the world's events try to bring us down at every turn. Today, we mourn the falling of a political titan. Join us.

Suggested talking points: Cain Train, Shorty, Aggro-Sexual Art, Bite the Rose David, Teeeeens, Instructions for Salvation, The Long Hoard, Gender-based movies, Podtraxx, MADDAFCS

Happy week of Thanksgiving, everyone! In this episode, we discuss the many, many things on this Earth we're grateful for, and offend the Pat Morita estate within the first 90 seconds or so. It's a holiday show the whole family can enjoy, assuming they are bad people.

Suggested talking points: Sweet Potato Protocol, Five Years of Lovin', Sexy Kickball, Man vs. Sadness, Washing Off the Night, Risk/Reward, Before Twilight, Turbacon, On a Good Day

This week's episode is a little late, because Griffin spent all weekend in New Orleans. On the plus side, he speaks with a cajun accent the whole time! On the minus side: It is incredibly offensive to everyone.

Suggested talking points: Creepin', Vitamin Caddy, Heartpool, Infected City, Arcade Fire of 1972, Dovahkiin, My Gushers, Yellowcard

This week, the McElroy brothers are celebrating their own birthdays. All three of them. They were all born on the same day, because their parents would never do something so cruel as to leave one of them out of shared birthday festivities.

Suggested talking points: Birthdaze, Trivia Stragglers, Itchy Secrets, Lump Sums, Heart's Desire, Five Minutes of Seaman Humor, Purest Truesilver, Goof Ya to Sleep

This week, the McElroy brothers are celebrating their own birthdays. All three of them. They were all born on the same day, because their parents would never do something so cruel as to leave one of them out of shared birthday festivities.

Suggested talking points: Birthdaze, Trivia Stragglers, Itchy Secrets, Lump Sums, Heart's Desire, Five Minutes of Seaman Humor, Purest Truesilver, Goof Ya to Sleep

It's our super special Halloween Spooktacular, and you know what that means: We quickly forget that it's Halloween, and start going off on tangents about high school boners and how cool Randy Jackson's eyewear is. Pretty spooky, right?

Suggested talking points: Dogg Pound, Hearse, Ingratia, Clownfish, The Fight Club Heist, Engorged, Cat-calling, Moving Like Jagger, The King of Dead